This week I was asked to write an article on how to “entertain” kids during the summer. It’s supposed to be tips for parents so having the kids home all summer doesn’t drive you crazy. The thing is, I don’t really believe in entertaining kids.
Maybe this is part of my “renegade parenting.” After all, I’m writing a book about this topic so I suppose it’s expected that my parenting views counteract the norm. Here’s what I believe in instead:
Creativity – When kids are left to their own devices they get creative and PLAY. All sorts of imaginative games with all sorts of creative props. When my two kids spontaneously fall into a make-believe game, my job is to stay out of the way and offer supplies like cardboard when needed.
Boredom – We need to let children be bored. To daydream. To gaze at ceiling cracks and clouds. Our job is not to entertain children every moment. It’s OK if they do not seem to be doing anything all the time.
Reading – Stories, stories, stories. Whether it comes from reading aloud, singing songs or looking at picture books by themselves or listening to a book on CD. Summertime is meant for reading.
Daily rhythms – Even in the bliss of summer days, kids should know what’s expected each day. Get dressed by a certain hour, have an outing each day. Go outside every day at least twice a day.
Work – I’m talking about chores, which for very young kids is mostly personal responsibility. Putting their clothes away, picking up toys, bussing their dishes after a meal. This is not entertainment, but young kids often enjoy learning these skills and the sense of independence it brings.
Experiences – I guess this is as close as I get to “entertainment.” Experiences can be walks by the river, visits to museums, play at the beach, camping trips, an outing to see owls at the nature center. These are places I go out of my way to take my kids to so they can discover and experience the larger world.
Relationships – Equally as important as experiences are relationships. I spend my time helping the kids get to know their neighbors, modeling caring acts, and putting them in the company of a variety of people. It’s far more important for them to see me taking care of an elderly neighbor than “entertaining” them.
Adult time – Kids take a backseat to adult needs sometimes. For me this happens at least three times a day: early morning (my sacred writing time when nobody can bother me until 7am), nap time (or quiet time for my older child), and evening. After bedtime stories are through, it’s adult time for the rest of the evening. The kids know they can’t intrude.
I’ve never really thought my job was to entertain kids (except maybe during my stint as a camp counselor; even then it was so much more). My job is to raise kids, to give them the freedom and space they need to explore the world. Entertainment is pre-packaged fun – good fun, maybe, but usually following someone else’s idea. Summer is an excellent time for kids to learn to follow their own ideas. In fact, it’s essential. Kids need that time to recharge after being told what to do during the whole school year.
Were you entertained as a child? What were your favorite summer days like?
